Do You Expect To Marry Someone That Will Beat You? How Women Are Looked at in Islam

Ironically, a lot of my friends were very nervous when they heard that I was becoming Muslim because they thought I would end up with a guy who would hit me or hurt me or be disrespectful of me.

And that’s the farthest thing from the truth.

In all the dealings I’ve had with Muslim men, in general they are very respectful.  They can be harsh, they can be annoying, but that’s all men! Not just Muslim guys.

And yes, there are cases of domestic violence among Muslim couples, but there are also cases of domestic violence among nonMuslim couples. From what I have seen through my own experience, Muslim men are actually much LESS violent and abusive – both verbally and physically.

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It’s a stereotype that Muslim men are violent, but it’s not accurate.  Especially with how they treat women.

To be completely honest, I’ve never been treated so respectfully by a man as I have been by my brothers in Islam.

They are respectful, they don’t gawk at you, they don’t gawk at other women (at least not openly), they treat you like someone deserving of respect.  And it’s due to our religion.

Our religion commands men to be respectful of women:

(Paraphrasing here): A man came to the Prophet Muhammad and asked who he should love most, after Allah and Muhammad, Muhammad said “your mother” and he asked him again, “then who?” and Prophet Muhammad said “your mother”, he asked again “your mother” and again, “then, your father.”

This shows the greatness of mothers in Islam, and how important it is to treat this woman with respect.

There is another hadith that says that if you raise three girls to be good Muslims, you will be promised Jannah (Heaven).

There’s nothing that says the same for raising three boys.

I had a conversation with my grandma about this recently.  She said she hopes that I will find a guy that will show me as much mercy as my grandfather has shown on her.

InshaAllah ya Rab.

And, she asked me if men in Islam are as kind as nonMuslim men.

I told her they are much kinder in general.

I think this mostly because they are commanded to be gentle with their wives by their Creator.  I will talk more about polygamy in a post for later, inshaAllah, but in general they are good to women.

I don’t agree with modern society, to be honest with you.  I don’t like the idea of women working and children going to a babysitter.  I don’t think women are equal to men.  I do, however, think that we are equally as important, but we’re not equal.

God denoted the roles of men and women for a reason.  Women are more tender, compassionate, caring and therefore are better suited to stay home with children and take care of them.

Men are better with security, strength, braveness, therefore they are better providers.

And with our duties come responsibilities and rights.  This is the difference of Islam.

We have duties to one another, women are to protect what belongs to their husbands, be loyal in every way, care for their husbands, but men also have duties that aren’t the same as women, but are equally important and needed.

I pray that more women and men learn to respect the commands of their Creator and learn to respect our roles.

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May Allah (swt) send every deserving woman in the world an equally deserving man, may He make each of the genders a solace for one another and may my future husband respect me as much as I have respected him over my entire life, whether I know him now or not. And Ya Rab he is REALLY HOT 😉

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2 thoughts on “Do You Expect To Marry Someone That Will Beat You? How Women Are Looked at in Islam

  1. Hi Hannah! I have been so inspired by your journey and I’m hoping that I can get in touch with you privately. I am a little lost and confused..

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